Just, fml

There are just too many things troubling me now. Too much stress and pressure and over thinking and whatever you can link to those negative feelings. Life of a junior college student is really so fucking tough and stressful that you just wished that you could just sleep and never wake up. Long hours of lessons which require a lot a lot of energy and you just feel so drained out at the end of the day. Homework and revision are just too much and too difficult for you to handle. In addition, CCAs and all those activities or events make you more lethargic. 

So this is what the society is. You just need to keep on studying, working, upgrading yourself, fighting for a stable job and income. People don't even talk about interest or passion or their dreams now. All you can do is just take any route that leads you to a better future of a high-paying job. You are just letting time pass like this everyday.

I'm really just, physically and mentally tired. I just couldn't come to a decision. I can't weigh out all the advantages and disadvantages. I mean like, making a decision for the sake of myself, or for the sake of you? People say, "Follow your heart". But my heart says, "You sure you want to follow this maze?"

There are bound to be gossips and people judging. And then others will say, "What for care about all these if that is really what you want?" Yeah, everyone judge others and everybody are like they don't care about people judging them. But honestly speaking, who can really really really ignore all these and not be affected AT ALL?