Back from camp

So i'm back from the 4D3N adventure camp @ Malaysia. Fun and awesome classmates made the camp funny and epic. But the way the High Achievers instructors plan thing are seriously too fucked up. Hate it totally. Making me run the entire beach and then straight away climbing the hill is really killing me. I became so dark and ugly omg this makes me more unwanted lol

Something that turns me off the most is that you and I were like together for all the activities. How suay is this man. When we were together, we wish for everything to be together. Now when we are not, then we are fated to be together. Hais. I saw how you behave with the girls, saw how the girls touched you. I saw everything throughout these days. I talked to them and I realised that I'm really not the one for you. I realised that I have really lost this battle and i really lost you. The way you behave when you are with them really let me know that, you weren't happy when you were with me. I guessed I really did not make you feel so happy and relaxed before and no burden at all.

I really tried very very hard to get over you during this camp. Got allocated to the same bus with you & I didn't want to change with other people because I really want to get over you. I think I had made a great improvement in getting over you but I admit that I was really sad after the party during campfire. Everything was similar to "Jam & Hop" and I realised that I actually have a phobia of such things because that night was the worst night in my life ever. Got forgotten by you and got dumped. Alone throughout the entire "Jam & Hop" while everyone was happily dancing, playing, taking photos. And when the "everyone" includes you. This feeling really sucks.

But I really wonder if you ever think of me during the camp. Felt so empty because i feel so sick & tired & yet i got no one to rely on. No particular person i can tell, no particular person that will care for me. I relied too much on you. This is bad. Makes it harder for me to get over you. But i really accepted this hurting truth. Just hope that you won't never forget me.